Tip of the week: BUILD YOUR RESILIENCE, MANAGE YOUR EMOTIONAL LABOR! It was Friday afternoon, and I was emotionally tired. I also was hungry, but primarily I was grumpy. I did not know it at the time, but I was not managing my stress too well. I had spent the previous three days in self-isolation, and early that morning, I had gone to take my 15th COVID test! I had no symptoms, but every time I interact with someone who tests positive, a test is required to ensure my colleagues’ safety. It is the right thing, and I gladly do it, but the hours between the test and the result are long and worrisome.
I thought I had gotten used to it, but I discovered that was not true. As explained in a previous message, I engaged in emotional labor (I am vulnerable, that’s my strength!), I did not manage my stress. I was keeping my ‘professional game face,’ not building my resilience. I was fooling myself by pretending to be cool when I was emotionally tired, grumpy, and anxious in reality.
I had every reason to feel as I felt, but I (unwisely) decided to ‘play tough.’ Only seven days before, the previous Friday, I had gone through the same emotional roller coaster involved in every COVID test. This Friday, I was again counting the hours until the final verdict came in the form of a cold email. Would it be COVID positive this time?
As I dispatched as much work as I could in the circumstances and disingenuously looked at my inbox and WhatsApp searching for the test result, a lesson disguised as a surprise came knocking at my door. Someone had delivered a delicious pizza, a plate of hot chicken wings, and a bowl of ice cream! My grumpy face transformed into an ear-to-ear smile and my anxiety into gratitude. The delivery came from two of my team members, and with their generosity, they helped me recall that my strength was my vulnerability, not my ‘game face.’
It has been more than a week since I enjoyed the pizza and the lesson, but I cannot forget the impact it had on me. After I finished my lunch, hours later, the mail announcing that my isolation was over and my test was negative arrived. I was relieved, but when the result came, it was no longer that important. Thanks to the support of my team, I was ready to accept whatever came my way.
Have you considered how important are you to your teammates? Do you realize the impact of a small caring action? When was the last time you reached out to them?
Obviously, I am no longer sitting on the fence regarding whether our teams should be considered an extended family (Be a leader: treat your colleagues as family members?). I am now convinced they should, and I am grateful to have them in my life.
I am sure your teams play an equally important role in your lives, even if you don’t know it yet. Please, take my advice, go out on a limb, and make sure you play the function required to improve your synergies and appreciate everyone’s contributions. It will make a difference!
To facilitate managing your stress during these stressful times, I invite you to consider Anna and Stephanie Marston’s article on how to build your resilience (https://hbr.org/2018/02/to-handle-increased-stress-build-your-resilience)